My wife and I have recently come off a transition in our roles. We successfully passed off many of our leadership responsibilities to men and women we trained up and walked with.
This is every leaders dream and greatest moment of success, to see something you’ve begun outlast you and be improved by another.
It can also be a place of great insecurity.
In our mission, many leaders hang on to titles far too long for fear of no longer having a voice.
We were not afraid of a loss of influence, but freedom to invest in whatever you want sounds both fantastic and terrifying at the same time.
There have been moments of insecurity and near panic attacks for me. My wife has been dealing with debilitating migraines.
Our dream of “doing whatever we want” has not gone quite as envisioned.
Tullian Tchividjian in his book, [amazon_link id=”B00969I86Y” target=”_blank” ]Glorious Ruin: How Suffering Sets You Free[/amazon_link], presented two paths or theologies.
In missions and ministry we can often embrace a “theology of glory”, where we speak positively in the face of difficulty. We must put on a strong face or the support may dry up. We are missionaries after all! Suffering is a part of the job description!
We stuff our pain, our fear, and our moments of doubt under the mask of strength and “togetherness”.
In other words, we fake it!
To use Tchividjian’s terms, a “theology of the cross” can change this. It allows us to hurt, to fear, to have the occasional doubt, or to experience of seasons of stress without having to question our spirituality.
> “The gospel frees us to speak honestly about the reality of pain, confident that nothing rides on our ability to cope with or fend off suffering.”
Jesus’s words to doubting Thomas at the end of the gospel of John illustrate this so well.
The disciples were hiding in a locked room for fear of the people when Thomas’ doubts were alleviated.
The one who demanded the proof of touching the scars and feeling the side of Christ, had those concerns taken away in a moments with the words, “Peace be with You.”
In times of doubt, fear, and uncertainty; the words of Christ ring true.
Peace doesn’t always give us answers or explain the why. Thomas is never recorded as fulfilling his demands to feel Christ’s wrists and side.
Peace does not always come as we feel we need it, but Christ, who knows us better than ourselves, deems what is appropriate.
May the peace of Christ lead us to exclaim a personal statement of truth like Thomas, “MY Lord and MY God”.
“When an admission of suffering or weakness is interpreted as a lack of faith, honesty soon fall by the wayside, leaving the sufferer lonelier than before.” – Tullian Tchividjian
Photo credit: butterfly blue opal via photopin (license)
Comments
One response to “Peace be With You”
We need to always move forward. We can’t sit and wallow in our past failures, nor can we sit and bask in our past successes. Both can hold us back or hold us in place. Good for you for re-evaluating, training and being open for “more”.
My heart goes out to your wife, a fellow migraine sufferer. I have suffered since I was in my early twenties. Once I was diagnosed with diabetes, and cut back almost completely sugar, the migraines went away (maybe one or two a year). Praise the Lord. Surely worth a try. They say when you have a migraine you think you will die, and the other wishes you would. Hugs.